2. I still seem to have pneumonia...third (THIRD) course of antibiotics...and lots of us are well and truly sick of my having pneumonia....
3. Does anybody out there have any idea how much I HATE the term "stay-at-home mom"? I know lots of women who stayed at home when their children were small, who DID NOT CALL THEMSELVES stay-at-home moms. I did NOT fall into the category of "stay-at-home" mom, and these days there is something faintly sanctimonious about the term that, shall we say, gets my dander up. I think it misses the point.
I repeat, I do NOT fit the definition of "stay-at-home mom". I did stay at home for about 3 months after Sarah was born, or maybe it was only two. I think maybe it was only less than two. They phoned me and asked if I would like to teach a couple of math classes and I definitely recall saying, "YES!!!". Which is what I did; I taught a couple of UK Math classes every semester for several years, was gone from home 3-4 hours/day, 3 days a week, basically, so I don't qualify as a stay-at-home mom. But hey, We had somebody come stay at the house while I was at UK; and it's also true that she went to nursery school when she was 2 (it was the two morning a week, 2 year old nursery school at UK), and again when she was three (three mornings/week, 3 year old class). And I was also teaching when Martin was born. They always got fed; they always had clothes; we always ate dinner together (a real cooked meal) at home; house was usually clean; and then I committed (as far as I can tell) the ultimate crime of getting a full-time job when Sarah started first grade, with Martin still in day care/whatever...
HOWEVER, they were still able to play soccer, take piano/French horn lessons, sing in the CCC choir, go on trips, all that stuff, AND we ALWAYS ate family dinners together, cooked by yours truly. I would respectfully argue that they didn't suffer all that much (perhaps I did), and also that both have turned out okay...
This in the era before cell phones...OK, where is it you're going? When are you leaving? Who will be there? When will you be back? How can I reach you if I need to? Phone us if you need to.
Know what? We basically NEVER had any trouble with either of them...
My point here is that NOT staying at home does NOT equal Neglect. You can't protect your children from the world; even if you aren't at home all the time, it doesn't mean you aren't there when you need to be...
I will shut up...have I told you lately that I hate the term "stay-at-home-mom"?
4. More later...but I painted my fingernails almost black (Martin says it is "maroon red"), I was so annoyed...
Cheers, Lillie
OK. I'll bite. What/who pushed your button about the stay-at-home label? What a loaded issue!
ReplyDeleteI will pass along some wise advice I've received:
1. do not beat yourself up. Ever.
2. do not second guess yourself. Ever.
1. Uncle Sam is insistent about his money and he carries a big stick.
ReplyDelete2. What is with this 3-antibiotic-pneumonia stuff? Sounds dire. I guess it feels dire. Hope the 3rd med works. Maybe you need more/better Scotch?
3. Not sure black fingernails are an a propos response. But they are definitely liberating. I'm all for them.
Black fingernail polish is a rather benign response, I might suggest. I had forgotten I had a bottle of the stuff.
ReplyDeleteWant to know what pushed my "stay-at-home" button? Maybe you should call or email me. Not sure I want to post it on the blog...given that I'm a bit repentant about posting the stuff...